Babble

I've been wondering how it feels to be loved by the right one. is it so much happiness? is it the feeling you haven't felt before?
I've never been in a "real" relationship. well, I've been in a relationship once, but I can't say I was in a relationship because I didn't feel I was having a boyfriend. let's say it was just a status, because there weren't any special things that couples usually do. so, yeah, honestly I don't consider him as my ex.
but I've been in a situation where I was really close with someone. We have done those relationship stuff, but we weren't in a relationship.
it's weird, i know.
and now, I really wish for the real one. I've been wishing for it. a real relationship where I can be with someone I love and who loves me back. the one who I want to spend the rest of my life with, and he wants me too. the one who makes me fall in love deeper and deeper day by day. the one who can handle me. the one who will never give up on me.
I still remember on my last birthday I prayed to Jesus to give him to me before I turn 21 this November. I really hope I can spend my birthday this year with him, and I will celebrate Christmas with him too. and after that I will go through my days with him. How I wish it can come true.
you might be think I'm a girl who desperately want to be in love and to be loved. yes, indeed. I admit it. but it's normal, isn't it?
but until now it seems like there is no any sign. I can't even imagine who he is and how he will be like. I know that Jesus has His own time, and I believe He will never be late. but I can't deny that I want it to be happen in the near future. don't get me wrong, I just don't want to lie. this is what has been in my mind.
however I don't want to rush anything. I want to enjoy this waiting days while I'm preparing and fixing my self to be the better me, so when that time has come I've been ready to be with him. honestly, I'm not patient, but there's nothing I can do except waiting until God is ready to meet me with him.
for now, I only can pray that God will give me the best one. I believe He knows what's and who's the best for me and He understands what I really need.
keep on praying, Me, keep on praying.